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A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "How does this boat float? The father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, "How do fish breath underwater?" Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?" Again, the father repied. "Don't rightly know son." Finally, the boy asked his father, "Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?" The father replied, "Of course not, you don't ask questions, you never learn nothin'."
I was given the ultimatum 3 weeks ago. She said "it's me or your fishing." Gee I miss her.
Q. Where do fish sleep? A. In a river bed
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout ? Monkfish !
What fish is best to have in a boat? A Sailfish.
Where are most fish found ? Between the head and the tail !
What TV game show do fish like best? Name that tuna!
What do dirty fish read? Prawno Magazines!
How do you communicate with a fish? You drop it a line!
The little kid sat on the side of the road with a fishing line down the drain. Feeling sorry for him, and wanting to humor him, a lady gave him 50 cents, and kindly asked "How many have you caught?" "You're the tenth this morning," was the reply.
What part of a fish weighs the most ? It's scales !
Fisherman: What are you fishing for sonny? Boy: I'm not fishing, I'm drowning worms.
What kind of a fish does your Parrot sit on? A Perch!
What was the Tsar of Russia's favorite fish ? Tsardines !
A priest was walking along the cliffs at Dover when he came upon two locals pulling another man ashore on the end of a rope. "That's what I like to see," said the priest, "A man helping his fellow man." As he was walking away, one local remarked to the other, "Well, he sure doesn't know the first thing about shark fishing."
How do you tune a fish? With its scales!
What do naked fish play with ? Bare-a-cudas !
Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish. Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you. Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful.
What do you call a man with a large flatfish on his head? Ray!
Why are fish cleverer than humans? Ever seen a fish spend a fortune trying to hook a human?
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