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I thought of you all day today. I was at the zoo.

There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it.

I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

If your brain was chocolate it wouldn't fill an M&M.

You say that you are always bright and early. Well, OK!! We know you are early.

You have a face only a mother could love - and she hates it!

I you are in your right mind, I hope you go insane!

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma.

If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead already?

Would you like to replace my business partner who died this morning? I'll arrange it with the undertaker.

When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?

I thought of you all day today. I was at the zoo.

People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright.

Yo momma's so stupid that when i asked her for a color tv she asked me what color.

Well, they do say opposites attact...so I sincerely hope you meet somebody who is attractive, honest, intelligent, and cultured.

I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you.

Can I borrow your head for my rock garden?!

Yo momma like a race car: She's always burning rubber.

You have no trouble making ends meet. Your foot is always in your mouth!

Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?


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