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Some days you are the bug
He who fishes in another man`s well often catches crab.
Two wrongs don`t make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
A girl`s best asset is her `lie`ability.
He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.
Always remember you`re unique. Just like everyone else...
Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
It`s always darkest before dawn. So if you`re going to steal your neighbor`s newspaper, that`s the time to do it...
Despite the cost of living, it`s still popular.
A ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.
Your heart understands what your head cannot yet conceive
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works...
Nothing`s impossible for those who don`t have to do it.
He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on our ass...then things get worse.
Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
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